Our Head of department (HOD) gave the class an assignment to research on obsolete medical practices and I immediately got to work, scavenging and up-turning the internet in search of materials related to this assignment. I searched for obsolete practices and a whole lot of these practices were shown to me. However, one stuck with me because of how absurd it was. The hilarious part? There are people out there actively engaging in it.
Coffee Enema
First off, what is an enema?
This is a medical treatment that involves introducing a liquid solution into the rectum through the anus. The solution can be a mixture of water and other substances like liquid herbs, medication or soap. Each with their advantages and disadvantages.
Enemas are often used for bowel cleansing, constipation relief and most importantly, medication delivery. Enemas are given by medical professionals when they are “absolutely” necessary but I guess individuals with a knack for culture would think otherwise, especially parents. I’ve communicated with a few elders and their first resort whenever they feel any form of discomfort is to take enema without seeking any form of medical intervention first. I’ve even witnessed a case where a patient blatantly refused to take any medication if she wasn’t administered enema first. The doctor who knew the patient was clearly exhibiting signs and symptoms of malaria didn't want any part in the administration of this enema because nothing was wrong with her bowels.
In the actual sense, the range of diseases that individuals take enema for are just absurd. How do you take enema for a headache or for typhoid fever? How does it work? The enema solution, that is always almost immediately expelled out of the body, is somehow supposed to find its way to your head? Or to your bloodstream? But then again, people believe what they choose to believe at the end of the day.
Back to the coffee enema
As I stared at my research material, a thousand and one questions came to mind but it all narrowed down to “who invented this”? Why would I rather take my coffee anally than orally? This discovery made me see coffee in an entirely different light. The research material suggested that coffee enemas are good detoxifiers but there are no scientific backing for this and if we’re being honest, this is outrightly dangerous.
Regular enemas administered by medical professionals already have loads of disadvantages like discomfort, pain, rectal bleeding, infections and even allergic reactions so why attempt to take it a notch higher with coffee?
Coffee as a drink has a few qualities: the presence of antioxidants and its diuretic effects, that aid in the body’s natural detoxification process, but on its own, coffee is not a substitute for medical detoxification and need I mention that excessive consumption can be counterproductive to the human body. So why would an individual give out such medical advice? This particular medical advice from a questionable online source is both ludicrous and hilarious. I, for one, would never think of administering coffee through my anus and I hope you would not either.
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