You are right, and she has been working on her self healing for a long time, but you know these generational things are very complicated. The other problem is also that her mother is very cold at times, which I have also experienced with her and that's where she find it all the more difficult to break the barrier.
They have always been apart, barely meet, so there are lot of boundaries and it's not a normal mother daughter relationship. Some times she does not even know what to talk to her mother in general also, so with all those emotional challenges she feels very suffocated at times.