The bus swerved from side to side and I held onto the seats, gripping firmly . I felt sick- my stomach tumbled as if my intestines had gotten into a fight with each other. I shut my eyes tight, hoping that darkness would make me feel better. Nervously, I cast a glare at my co-workers with whom I’d been working for the past five years. None of them seemed to have noticed the driver’s reckless driving. They were modern people lost in a modern world. Every day on the bus after work, their eyes are always fixed on their cellphones, scrolling, tapping, smiling and laughing roaringly at intervals.
“Tomorrow is Cloud-ex,” Danny, the eldest guy with a weird accent, said out loud for everyone to hear.
Cloud-ex? I had no idea what the world meant but I instinctively didn't like where it was going.
“You coming, new guy?” Danny asked.
I'd spent 5 years working together with Danny, but he’d often call new guy to taunt me. Sometimes I wondered how long I had to stay before he’d change my tag. I didn't want to ask him what Coud-ex meant. He'd just go on rambling and laughing hysterically about how I was the weird one who liked to close his eyes against the world. “The odd ball amongst us.” as he'd sometimes call me. So, I thought of the perfect answer.
“No, Danny. Tomorrow is Saturday. I've got to go see my parents in Boston. The bus moves by 6.am. It’s a busy day for me.” I said, staring deeply into his eyes.”
He yelled out the one word, the one that never fails to get under my skin: 'Loserrrr.' The 'r' was dragged out like a screeching tire. Danny knew exactly what he was doing – pushing my buttons, testing my patience, pulling the air on my skin, and as usual, it worked.
“Go to hell, you asshole.” Of course, I said this in the tiniest voice ever. Danny would skin me alive if he ever heard me say that.
The excuse made me remember my family. The thought of seeing mom and Levi, my immediate younger brother, crossed my mind. It made me want to smile broadly. For a moment, a series of dark thoughts crossed my mind, threatening the little ray of sunshine.
“What if mom’s cancer had gotten worse? What if dad had chickened out and left her? What if Levi wasn’t doing well?”
I quickly warded the thoughts off. All of a sudden, Mary turned back and our eyes met. Her lips curled into a smile, and her teeth shone brightly, revealing her sharp incisors. The expression on her face read “Worry not, Danny is just a loser.” I got the message and it made me feel relieved. Mary is the only person in the world who doesn’t think I am a loser. First, it was dad. The first time he called me a loser was when I failed my entrance exam into law school. Mom and Levi haven’t outrightly called me a loser, but their eyes told a different story when I lost my job at Mr Hughes Automail shop.
Mary moved from her seat to mine and sat beside me.
“Hey, you,” she said as she placed her hand on mine.
“Hey.” My voice was cold and dry.
The bus swerved dangerously once more as it took a sharp turn. Once more, the bus’ tires screeched in protest. This time, we shifted violently to the right. Mary’s soft chin was pressed against mine, our faces inches apart. I stole a peek into her eyes, and in a fleeting moment, our lips met in a soft, desperate kiss. The world around us paused, our hearts missed a beat or two. The universe came to a stop, leaving only the droning of our beating hearts and the bus’ screeching tires. It was as if we were transported into another world. Just the two of us. Then, just as suddenly, the driver righted the wheels, and we were brought back to reality. We broke apart, our faces red with smiles.
For the third time that evening, the bus swerved, first to the right and then to the left. The tires wailed like they’d never before. The bus tumbled twice before it finally came to a stop. Everywhere was silent. The last thing I saw before I blacked out was Mary’s unconscious face. There were stains of blood on her forehead, and they’d started to drip down her chin, but she still looked as pretty as ever.
The next place I found myself was in the hospital. I recognized the walls and the weird smell that oozed from all corners. It brought back memories- Dad, Levi, and I had come to visit mom there when she was really sick and her hands had started to shake.
“You’re awake, Mr Kurt,” a woman dressed in all white said. If she hadn’t moved closer, I’d have passed her off as an angel.
“You were in an accident.”
“Yes, I remember,” I said, averting my gaze from hers.
My legs had been hurting ever since I opened my eyes. It was as if a thousand fireflies were feasting on them. I tried to stand and stretch my legs, but the woman in all white quickly intervened.
“You can’t, Mr Kurt.”
“I can't do what?” I asked curiously.
“You can’t stand,” she replied. “We had to amputate your legs. The doctor will be here to explain the details.”
“But I can feel my legs. They hurt,” I said, almost screaming.”
“What you're experiencing is phantom pain, ” she explained.
She then lifted the bed covers so I would see for myself that my legs were really no more.
What about the others? My coworkers on the bus? Mary?” I asked.
She averted my gaze for some seconds, and when she looked back, her expression was dingy, filled with a deep regret. I could sense the unspoken words: my life was forever changed.
I sighed, closed my eyes tightly, and this time, I saw Mary's beautiful eyes. The fleeting moment when we kissed flashed through my mind.
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