Hello #ladies, @ladiesofhive, Happy Easter. Here is another week to share our thoughts.
For this week, i will be answering question two;
● Extending financial support to family members may be a given, but in these difficult times our friends may find themselves in genuine need.What resource boundaries, conditions, or rules do you have to limit yourself?
Actually, extending helping hands to family and friends is a responsibility one can't really shy away. But setting boundaries is one difficult decision that one should make with wisdom.
At some point in my life, i had learned this the hard way. My experience made me understand that i needed boundaries while offering help to both family and non- family members.
My husband likes giving me money to keep for him, and i used to do that diligently. But one of the times he sent in money for me to keep, though the money wasn't meant for urgent use.
Few months later my friend's child had a serious health challenge which needed money urgently and i was called to help, i couldn't say no because life was involved, so i took out my husband money and offered to help. As a mother i understand the desperation, the fear, that is companied by children's ill health.
In my mind, i was telling myself i would replace the money as soon as my salary comes. But then i had great disappointment because my salary for that month was delayed.
Then, not so long, my husband asked for his money ...........Phew!!!! I was so ashamed of myself because i didn't even know how to explain to him what i used the money for. Not as if giving out the money to help was bad, but at that point, i saw a bridge in communication. Besides, the money wasn't mine.
After that incidence i came up with some rules to guide my decisions
- Never use someone else's money to help another, unless I am given the permission to .
- Never lend anyone an amount you can't let go
- Communicate no matter how urgent .
For some times now, this simple rules has been a guide and saved me from being a victim to some troubles.
Most importantly, my experience taught me how to set boundaries no matter who is involved.
Thank you, @kerrislravenhill, for this topic because it just bought back memories and keeps me on check.
Thank you for stopping by my blog, @pascalukandy.
