So I was having an argument with my roommate about how crying is actually a good emotional exercise. Before I continue, let me just say what started the argument in the first place.
My roommate just found out her partner of 2 years has been cheating on her for a while now. So she came to me really angry and asked me what to do. I told her to just cry (if she wants to) and end the relationship. She then told me that crying would actually mean she’s giving the guy some level of relevance.
I honestly didn’t agree, but I’ll explain anyway. She said the moment she allows tears to flow down her cheeks because of the guy, she’s made him important (more like she only cries about important stuff). Looking at what she said from her angle, I understood her. But I also explained that in this case, crying was just an emotional exercise that was going to let her feel better.
And from my point of view, that’s almost like solving the problem. Let me break it down yeah? You are hurting because you’re emotionally overwhelmed and almost at the verge of exploding. So from my mental equation, if you allow yourself to let go of the pain, then that’s more like solving the problem.
So maybe he really doesn’t deserve your tears but you’re not even crying for him. You’re just freeing yourself from the kind of emotional pain you’re going through. She’s not yet agreed with me, but I heard her crying in her room some minutes ago and I know she’ll talk about it in the morning. Hopefully, she tells me she feels better so I can rub it in her face that I was right. What are roommates for? Hehe.
We always preach about how crying never solves any problem and how we need to stay tough to face our problems instead of crying. But then what if in this case, the problem is being emotionally overwhelmed and the way out is crying? What if all the person needs is that feeling of lightness that follows intense shedding of tears?
The person behind the tears may not be worth it, but the reason, the feeling of not being burdened, and the freedom you feel in your heart will always be worth those tears.
Images are mine