On my birthday, two months ago, a childhood friend had wished me well, including an, "You're getting older" in her text. I had laughed about it, but considering and thinking back to the age I was, only five years ago, which felt like yesterday and the present age I was getting into, I felt little jitters.
Still same day, my brother had made a happy birthday post about me on his whatsapp status and he included a picture of me when I was, say 5 or 6 years old. In that picture, myself, my parents and my bug brothers were in it.
And so, the first rude awakening was seeing how younger my parents looked. They had no bags under their eyes, neither wrinkles, nor the slouching that comes with age. They were young and agile.
I realize that, my childhood and teen days seemed to move slowly. Actually, I think they crawled. But since entering into adulthood, every waking day just happened to be my birthday and a new age(not literally).
I'm at the point where I am truly independent and it's only a short time before I take up bigger responsibilities like having a family and raising it.
Before I grew to my present age and maturity, more like when I was a teen whenever any one said that I was getting old, I rebuked them. However, we all want to grow old, but looking at much older person with all that grey and weakness and fragility made us scared. Now ask us if we would rather die now than live until a very old age and still watch as we rebuke. Lmao
I don't know if you get it - wanting to grow older, more independent, but not wanting to be old.
Now, I'm not scared of it. I look forward to so many things that I feel I would enjoy at different stages of growth. My looks are a 100. And although thry are not reliable, I used a snapchat filter that edited my face to look older(futuristic)and boy, did I still look awesome. A beautiful, ageless man. My parents, save for the stress that added more wrinkles than should be, are aging beautifully. Good genes, huh?
Financially, I'd say that I'm not at same point that I was in the last few years. I never would want to be old and broke hence the reason I'm working so hard, saving more, investing at best and making better financial decisions that should have positive effect on my future and retirement, in due time.
I think what scares me most is vulnerability. The inability to care for myself, think for myself, help myself. From the healthy practices I keep right now and somehow, considering how older persons in my family fare, I feel like it's unlikely that I get so weak and decapitated. Still, the thoughts that I would need help to do some of the things I easily would do now, thr thought that I'd be asked to 'go and rest' and leave certain tasks for the 'young and agile ones' shakes me up a little.
Growing old is a given. And by a large extent, I believe that if I take the right steps, I can coordinate my finances such that I live comfortably. Looks? I'm not scared. Every age comes with its kind of beauty.
And, that's my response to the Weekend Experience Topic Week 215
All images are mine
Thanks for stopping by.
SOKA🖤