Nourishing my Soul — ArchonApp

I have been silent this past few weeks. I just feel that there is just too much happening at work. If I would have written something on those weeks, its more about me venting, expressing frustrations and fears.

It is not easy being a nurse. I kept wondering why did I become one: you get vomited, bled, spat, shitted, pissed upon everywhere. Sometimes, you get to be involved in some complicated family drama; stories that you do not want to hear, choices that you do not agree upon, things that you felt are beyond you. There are many times when I wanted to cry because things felt very overwhelming, frustrating, tiring. Moments when all I wanted to do was quit or be reborn into a completely different life.

I kept thinking recently that there must be something wrong for me to enjoy taking care of people. But when I look at the mirror and see through my eyes, I remember the endless help I got from people who has no other goal but to nourish and protect me; people who are not even related to me but are keen for me to succeed, flourish.

I guess kindness has many forms. Mine probably of me enjoying taking care of people, being part of the most challenging moments in their lives.

I need to be paid in order to live. But, being told by my patients that they are going back to their old lives, traveling or starting a new venture are oddly more satisfying. It nourishes me, it keeps me going. It keeps my hopes up that with the proper guidance and support, one's soul gets nourished, renewed, healed.