When I was a child, my parents tried to indoctrinate their gender norms unto me. My mother believed that anything incompetent and disposable was "obviously made by a man 🙄," and that the only thing men were good for was "sperm donation." Meanwhile, my father believed that there were certain things that were "a woman's job," because women were "better" at cooking, cleaning, and laundry.
As a child, I found their views disheartening... Not only my parents' views, but all of society's! And that, ultimately, I would come to learn, understand, and accept all of these gender stereotypes when I was older! I vowed that my relationships would never be shrouded in "sexism" like my parents'.
So, when my husband and I began living together, we originally tried to share all of the work 50/50 -- house chores and taking care of our newborn first-born child. At first, everything seemed to be working out fine!...
...But then we began to notice a pattern: we were arguing about the same things every day. The dishes piled up in the sink, who is going to wake up with the baby, who's cooking dinner tonight?
Eventually, the things that bothered me the most, rather than continue complaining about them, I simply decided to take over.
Because as unfair or sexist as it may seem, men and women are better at different things. As a woman, I find myself more detail-oriented, and therfore more susceptible to the little things bothering me. The dishes could sit in the sink for weeks before my husband finally decides to do them, simply because they would never cause him concern. Me?? I can't stand to look at a full sink for more than an hour!! 😭🔫
Or cooking! I never used to cook before marriage -- microwavable garbage for one, please!~ 🙏 My husband used to do the majority of the cooking. However, as I started honing my skills, I found that we both preferred my cooking more! 😅 Again, I have a better time with it because of the attention to detail. My husbands noodles are always a bit too hard because he doesn't keep track of how long they have been boiling. Baking?! 😫 he is a complete lost cause, I dunno what it is about men and baking, but they can't do it worth a damn!! 🤦♀️
It isn't acknowledging that I'm superior because of the things I'm better at; it is about acknowledging each other's strengths and weaknesses. It is about acknowledging that as men and women, we use our brains differently. My husband may not be able to find the jar of mayo staring him straight in the face, but he is able to differentiate screwdrivers just from one quick glance at the screw (it takes me a minute just to identify the shape of it! 😳). He can't follow a recipe for an hour, but he is willing to sit down with the vehicle manual for the same amount of time to find and fix the issue.
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