My perspective of the world has always been simple till it wasn't. My principles are guided by what is right or wrong, bad or good, black or white. Nothing too complex beyond what is considered ordinary but as I grew older, I understood that there are other things that exist in between, things we can't quantify with words.
Situations we can't really explain, it requires us to do things we consider to be wrong but feels so right at the moment. It is always easy to judge others when we see them do things we feel like we would never do, but when we find ourselves in a similar situation we would realize everyone is just trying to survive which makes us all human.
Is it ok to tell a lie, when the truth might be more devastating? If I were an average person, I would have said no but based on the experience I have had, life is not black and white. There are times when we tell lies to protect the interest of others, it might seem inappropriate but I believe the truth should not be used to hurt people. I know the truth should matter always but if the truth you are telling, does more harm than good, it might make you reconsider.
I had an experience about 6-7 years ago, though I have narrated it in a similar prompt but its relevancy still remains because it is the only time I had gone through an experience such as this.
I live in a house with a family of six, as the second child of the family I am good with numbers as if I studied commerce before coming to earth. For that reason I'm closer to my mum than my other siblings because I assist her in managing the finance aspect of her business. Which means my account was used mostly for her transactions, sometimes she will purposeful keep some funds in my account for safe keeping.
While I was doing my national diploma in gateway polytechnic, she kept about 50k in my account for reasons I wasn't aware of. She told me she will make use of it by December, We were around August then. During that time it was almost time for us to pay our school fees, I was still expecting mine from my parents.
I had this friend then named Ebenizer, he was my room mate in ND1 till I moved to another community in ND2. His parents at the moment were struggling with their finances which made it difficult for them to cater for his academic needs including school fees. He was at the blink of dropping out, because exam was approaching. I took pity on him and offered to help because I felt like I was in the position to do so.
He promised to return the money by September, I had it at the back of my mind that since December was still far from the current month, we will be fine as long as he keeps his promise. I gave him 30k out of the money that was kept in my account to add to the amount he had gathered to complete his school fees. When it was time for me to pay for my school fees, my dad sent me 5k to add to the money in my account for my school fees. He told me he had already spoken to my mom about it. He wasn't aware that I had used out of the money already. I couldn't tell him what I had done, I just nodded "ok" to what he said.
My present situation now seem similar to the mess my friend was and I can't pressure him for the money because the date he promised is still far away. I could have informed my dad or Mom but I didn't want to damage the trust my mum had in me. I sourced around for the money but it wasn't enough to cover for the amount I needed, though I knew it was silly but at the moment my ego was all I had to protect.
On the long run, i found a guy who made me an offer to buy my phone, I was using Infinix hot 4 pro, though the amount he offered was not up to the amount I bought the phone but due to my desperate needs for money, I had no choice but to sell the phone. I was bitter all week because I was "phoneless"😅. My exam was extremely stressful because I had a lot of materials I could have used on my phone for but I couldn't, it affected my examination performance a lot.
The exam lasted for about 2-3 weeks. I was already preparing for a way to get a new phone with the remaining money I got from selling my phone. So I waited till September in school to get the money back from him and that was how I was able to purchase a new phone and went home.
Was it worth it? Well, I never told my parents about it till today but I knew, if I had told them they would have understood and refunded the money which would have saved me from the agony and stress I experienced. But the truth is, it would have damaged the trust my mom have in me and I don't know if my parents might decide to reach out to my friend, which feels inappropriate because the mess was not his fault. Do I feel the lie was justified? I believe it was, which is why I wasn't too pained when I find myself paying for the consequence of my action.
This write-up was inspired by weekly featured content titled A white lie in hive learners community.
Cover Image - generated using chatgpt
