Ever just felt like the weight is too much and the expectations from you is just a lot, and all you want to do is sit down and take a breath, like a deep long breath. Forgetting everything and just thinking about yourself for a minute, what makes you happy, what makes you feel alive and just be happy for a split second. It's just a lot when you're expected to do a lot of things when you get to a certain age.
The funny thing is you don't even feel like such should be expected of you at that age but it is😔😔. You know, there was once a time we had no worries in the world and we just basked and lived in the beauty of this world not worrying about anything. Just like few days ago we wrote some things about our childhood days and what we did as children but what really got me while writing on that topic was how happy it was back then. I MISS those days. Adulting is a whole lot and I think we upcoming adults need a manual to help us navigate through this phase cause it's a lot.
How did our parents even do it? How did our uncles do it? How did our aunties do it? I haven't gotten anywhere but I'm tired already. It's worst that things are quite hard now both financially and every way. The fact that you suddenly become an aunty or uncle and you begin to have neblings who look up to you and expect certain things from you is something else. And you can't do anything about it cause it's the norm and you also did it to their parents.
Being looked up to as a role model is a lot also, like you haven't finished getting your shit together and there's someone looking at you as this perfect adult that he/she wants to be like, so you try your best to be perfect for this cause, sometimes you don't even know what you are doingggg(it's a lot) 😭😭
While I was little, I couldn't wait to be an adult you know, I wanted to be an adult so badddd, I wanted to stay alone, wanted to have responsibilities that'll make me proof I was a strong lady, I wanted to be able to go out as I please, wanted to have and spend my own money. Little did I know that reality would eventually set in and life isn't always as we see it from a child's lense.
I want nothing more than to be at my father's house right now, have my mother tell me what to do when I'm confused and hug me when I feel overwhelmed like right now, having the security of having food and shelter that I didn't use my money to get😔, get pocket money again and just have zero worries of what next life is about to throw my way yet again.
Seriously tho, does it even get better? Do we eventually get used to it or we just learn to live in this adulthood and try our best to just be the best we can be and do what we can do? But then is what we can do ever enough? Doesn't it always seem like you're not doing enough at some point? You know, not to justify drinking and all but I get to understand why adults drink sometimes, it's not always about being useless or anything, I think it's mostly about relieving stress and relaxing a bit from all these many thinking and all. It's really not easy going through life and it's many struggles and expectations. It's a lot. I pray and hope every upcoming adult find a good and perfect way to navigate through this new phase. Trust me we all need all the help we can get and I hope the world is ready to teach us and accommodate our many questions.
