In those youthful times, due to feelings, emotions, and age, that ideal partner always emerged, the one we desired at that moment or that our mothers dreamed of for their daughters.
The thing is, it's one thing to meet someone, to be friendly, but the difference is when that idealized partner lives under the same roof. The topics of conversation, if one is a good conversationalist, tastes in food, tidiness, discipline, among other things; That's not visible in the infatuation that each person then develops, the back-and-forth arguments, the moments of leisure that turn into nothing but leisure. It's a multitude of elements that, without us realizing it, in those moments, due to feelings of love or what we believe to be love, we become entangled in, trying to maintain that concept of family we grew up with, without seeing those behind-the-scenes issues where nothing was ever discussed, and everything remained as if nothing had happened.
After time, some decide to separate for various reasons, others stay with their chosen partner for so many years. There are countless situations where we cry, feel helpless, unappreciated. In short, a multitude of things that we eventually realize, or in my personal case, when I understood that we are unique and irreplaceable human beings and that when we accept someone, we must accept them as they are, with all the emotional, financial, and familial baggage they bring... Of course, I learned that over time, after a long period of silence within myself, truly understanding many things, I accepted the person with whom I decided to build my home.
Today, our relationship could be considered ideal because of the way we treat each other and live together. Those around us always see us together, wherever we can be. They say we're an admirable couple. Although my growth in this relationship has been very successful at this point in my life, I'm not explosive. I listen before responding, or I don't respond at all; I just listen. I keep things peaceful, but in a way that fosters good relationships. I feel that the ideal partner doesn't exist; what exists is understanding. When we understand that each person has their own way of thinking, but that person respects your thoughts and actions and is so attentive to you that they text you at the most unexpected times: "I love you so much."
I feel that, unfortunately, we don't see this as we get older. We want that chosen person to think like us, to like what we like, to accept us unconditionally. What we should do is live with agreements so we don't fall into those kinds of anxieties and frustrations, ending up with headaches just because the other person didn't think the way we wanted.
It's a world that everyone must explore, when they decide who to be with.
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