While this story is reasonably well written, one gets the feeling as reading progresses that we have been dropped into the middle of a scene. Besides picking out a dress and capturing the attention of a suitor, nothing much happens.

The story reads fine, and the dialog works well, but one is left with the question, Why read this? What have we learned about the protagonist except that she seems to be quite vain and shallow. In the future, you might give the story more context and greater development. You seem to have the skills to achieve that goal.

Thank you for sharing this with us, @sabrinah