Looking To Retire
I never thought that deciding to retire would feel like ordering at a fancy restaurant—I knew what I wanted, but when the waiter came, I stuttered and pointed at the menu. “Uh, I’ll take it…retire with peace of mind and enough money to buy a house on the beach?” Of course, there was no such option. There was just a long list of surprising uncertainties.
A friend of mine, who was wiser or at least quicker to decide, once said, “Retirement is like chewing gum. It tastes sweet at first, then you realize you have to keep chewing it and don’t know when to throw it away.” I laughed at the time, thinking it was the hyperbole of a guy who’s read too many philosophy books. But now, on the brink of retirement, I’m starting to understand what he meant.
Let’s talk about retirement planning—a concept that sounds like music to the ears of those who’ve worked for decades, but when you approach it, it’s more like an orchestra that’s lost its conductor. I’ve spent most of my life working, saving, and muttering cliches like “when I retire, I’m going to travel the world!” Sure, traveling the world sounded great… until I remembered that my knees were now creaking every time I climbed stairs, and I had no patience for waiting in line at immigration.
So what about a more modest plan? A relaxing life in the countryside? Enjoying an afternoon with a cup of tea and a good book? That sounded ideal—until I realized that I’m not the type of person who can sit still without planning something new. If I wasn’t careful, I’d find myself starting a small business, growing organic tomatoes and selling them at the market with a philosophical slogan like “Taste the Sincerity in Every Bite.” And I couldn’t let that happen. I had to have a more concrete plan!
So, after much deliberation, I decided one thing: retirement wasn’t about quitting work, but about working differently—without annoying bosses, without endless meetings, and most importantly, without a 6 a.m. alarm clock sounding like a shipwreck siren. I’d stay busy, maybe write a book, maybe become an amateur restaurant critic, blindly praising dishes for free food. Either way, I’d have more laughs and less worries.
So, for anyone else considering retirement, let me give you some advice: plan flexibly, set aside funds for life’s surprises, and don’t be afraid to have fun. Because if life is a journey, then retirement shouldn’t be the end, but rather the beginning of a lighter adventure with a few fewer recliners and a cold drink in hand.
