Size does matter! || Oil painting exercise

The range of shades wears me out

Impressionists forget the existence of darkness

Academics forget about freedom

Abstractionists that not everything is relative

Minimalists that without grandeur they would not exist

Labels bore me

Admiring painting makes the hunger to create return. The search for one's own language and ways. Underpainting have been waiting for my hunger for a very long time. Last summer, I converted Ikea furniture cardboard boxes into underpaintings.

Right after I did all of those - I only made use of one backing and the rest... waited.

Not for inspiration, oh no - because there is never a shortage of that - but waiting for good weather. Oil paints like sunny weather and open air:) And Northern Ireland isn't famous for nice weather:)

I was keen to try playing with oil sticks, which I discovered some time ago in a art-supplies shop. The oil sticks have a bit in common with oil pastels. Nevertheless, their form is quite different. Pastels have a smooth consistency, whereas an oil stick is basically thickened and dried oil paint in a crayon. A very thick one too. It wouldn't make any sense to use this kind of tool on a small format, so I chose the largest format I had on hand - 175cm x 75cm.(69’’ x 30’’)

The last time I worked on a really large format was in Academy, and with oil paints that was - in high school. It used to be my favourite medium. Mainly because it resonates with my personality, or rather the essence of it - the hesitation.

Imagination was given to man to compensate him for what he is not; a sense of humor to console him for what he is.
― Francis Bacon

Oil paints give great freedom and allow for the constant joy of changing decisions. Paint, wipe off. Paint - then dissolve. My favourite painting technique, called ‘wet-in-wet’ - involves using linseed oil instead of turpentine at the initial stage of the work - which keeps the paint on the painting still wet. This allows us to make changes to all the layers of the painting at the same time - but it is also very risky - all it takes is a clumsy, unplanned movement - and much of our painting disappears.
So the stakes are high!

Also - I really like working with my fingers, I feel more in control then when working with a brush. Just touching a wet painting with my hands is liberating and gives me an almost childlike joy. This is extremely important to me - because the painting process itself makes me alternately furious or disappointed with my artistic frailty.

These fleeting moments of joy, one or two smiles - that's all I can muster. Only for these few moments do I know how to enjoy it instead of comparing myself to others.