Sometime last year, I was in a very messy situation and in a situation where I could have lost my life. There are some certain people in your life who should always be by your side no matter what happens like your family, good friends and maybe a few people too. I could not tell my family I was in a mess because I will be finished if I do so.
There was a particular person who was supposed to check on me everyday for at least two weeks to know how far I have gone but he didn’t. I even had to text him to remind him to always check on me so we could solve the issue on ground but he didn’t call me and I did every damn thing with my money. He didn’t check on me for two good weeks and I already made a vow not to ever text him again. I had a feeling of rejection which made me depressed.
When I started gathering myself together and thinking of how to move on with my life, I got a text from him and he wants to be unnecessarily friendly. Why not apologize when you know you’re wrong? Remembering what he did to me and seeing his texts everyday makes me depressed until I had to tell him to stop texting me and also deleted his contact. I did that politely though but I was depressed and crying my ass out in every corner that I find myself.
How am I now?
Honestly, I’m very good. At first, I was struggling hard with the depression and got me crying every now and then but with time, I started going out, talking to people and that was able to comfort me. Also, I was finding it hard to forgive him too but I realized that I was even the one going through more pains because not forgiving him means that I will always have him on my mind and I’d keep thinking about him which won’t make me heal on time.
I’ve now forgiven him but the only thing I want is to see him one more time. I know where he can be at some particular time so I’d just go to chill there.
What’s my aim?
My aim is just for him to see me and know that I’m doing very well. The fact that he rejected me does not mean life itself rejected me. I’m doing very fine and extremely happy.
What lessons did I get from the experience?
I learnt to always have your back. People can fvck up at anytime and if you rely on them too much, you’d be damn hurt so you should always have your back. You’re the best person you can ever have in your life and that can always go extra mile for you so make sure to be in your little world doing yourself heavily.
Have friends and have fun but at the end of it all, remember that you are all that you’ve got and if you enter the mode of depression, cry when you feel like you need to. It helps you to snap out fast of that situation.
