Good Day Everyone
Suddenly I am talking about white lies. For you who are familiar with English, it is easy to understand what is white lies. But I don't think that would be the case for some people who come from regions which are not familiar with English or having some bad compatibility with English to their own native language.
Lies do not have color, so it is not about being white. This is not some kind of RPG perk, which you have white mage and black mage. There would not be a black lies, grey lies, red lies, or maybe time lies lol
The term of white lies comes with white which means permittable. White lies are lies that can be considered harmless and do not have any impact, and they need to be delivered... yes the lies need to be delivered... in order to avoid hurting someone's feeling, or trying to be polite, or just do some formalities so everything will be smooth over a social situation.
To put this simple, White Lies are considered well intentioned and do not have any malicious intents. It's similar to Small talks
White lies are small, harmless lies that are often told to avoid hurting someone's feelings, to be polite, or to smooth over a social situation. They're generally considered minor and well-intentioned, rather than deceitful or malicious.
Example of white lies are like these:
- You tell small kids that if they do not go to sleep early, mosquitos will come and bite them.
- Telling your friend how good looking they are, or they get slimmer just to boost their confidence. The fact is not like that.
- Saying I am on the way, almost there, you need five more minutes... When you are running late.
and many more.
As someone live in Asia which we do try to be polite and indirect, we take White Lies are something that commons... atleast the older generation. However it is undeniable younger generation and a few people are against this, because they believe that A lie is a lie, everything should be honest and fair.
How Far You Can Justify Those White Lies
Even I said above that White Lies are common practices here, sometime they can become problematic because people try to stretch them further. Some people tend to overuse or misuse these practices and it will be a matter of time that trust will fade away.
Let's try to be positive here, it is not due to bad people, but sometime it becomes something that organic or instantly pop out in people head when the opportunity arise. Let say some people dislike confrontation so they will do these white lies to prevent any friction and confrontation.
And People should understand that white lies are still lies, one day people will find out the truth. When it happens, people will feel betrayed and patronized, and this could lead to a broken relationship.
Setting The Goal
Ok this sounds funny, setting the goal? yes a goal... is need when you do these white lies, so it is not just some habit and aimless act. I am going to share you some goals that could justify a white lie.
- Giving Comfort. Providing comfort can be done through white lies. Telling your friend who just lost a family member that their loved one is happy up there in Heaven... LoL how do you know that?
- Nurturing Relationship. Simple example, do you dare to say to your wife that she gets fatter? Men always say "oh honey you are beautiful" lol
- Professionalism. I do this a lot, telling white lies for professional setting. Telling my team Good Job guys, while the fact was I was gutted with their half ass efforts lol
There are many other goals, which you might figure out indirectly later. The most important one is those lies are harmless, not used for personal gain and manipulation.
Setting The Boundary
So I do not know whether you are the OK people with White Lies, or Disagree people with white lies. If you are the team OK, you need to keep or check your boundary in using white lies. Goals only are not enough, you need to set some rule of thumb or game play.
So here are mine:
Be clear with your intention. Intention and goals are a bit similar but they are different. When you tell white lies, you need to be clear about your intention, do you want to be good or you want to avoid some discomfort... Else you will be used with those lies to gain your own benefits.
Second one is to always weight the impact. White lies should be harmless, so you need to gauge or weight the impact to make sure your white lies won't harm others.
The last thing is how often you do tell lies... Frequency is very important, sometime you need to avoid white lies in order to not making them as your habit. Lies should never replace honesty, this is the very basic you must always remember.
I think these are all I can talk about White Lies. What do you think, do you agree with these practices? or maybe you can share your opinion below..
Thank you for coming and reading my post. I live in Jakarta, Ex-Capital City of Indonesia. Currently I am running a small business with less than 10 people. I used to live by making money online, that's why I like being here, on HIVE, and in #PIMP - (Paper In My Pocket) community.
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