The real lesson is outside school

in Hive Learnersyesterday

One major lesson I learned outside school is that failure is not the end, but a step toward growth. In school, failure often came with consequences like bad grades or punishment, so I used to fear it.But life taught me something different through real-world challenges, disappointments, and even rejection. I discovered that every failure carries a hidden lesson.

While in school I used to think that failing in grades made me a failure and that I couldn't make it in life. I was constantly trying my very best to please my father.I hated how my father was comparing me with my elder sister, it was that bad. Each time I fail in any subject in school, I wouldn't want to go home because I know for sure that I was going to be punished and scolded too.

One term, I scored 15 out of 35, which was the first time ever I was in that position, knowing who my father was. I didn't go home after school; I went straight to my grandma's house and reported myself. She told me it's okay to fail, but don't dwell on it for too long. You have always come first, second, third, and even fifth. Life is just teaching you that it won't always be rosy.

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Fast forward to when I became an adult, I decided to start my own business. I did all my feasibility study, balance sheet, market survey, and I felt that I was ready to go into the thrift business. It wasn't funny because I failed woefully, and I wasn't aware that thrift business can be heartbreaking. I tried to venture into another business, bunkery, that would turn women into men. The health hazards of that business are something else.

When my market was seized and was never released, I wept so badly. It was more heartbreaking than selling thrift clothes. School didn't teach me that failure can be so painful and can make you think of committing suicide. School never taught me that life can be really harder than when I was in school. Almost all the businesses I ventured into weren't yielding anything positive, and I was very depressed. I wasn't exercising but I was getting slim and was always frowning, and would lash out at anybody at the slightest provocation.

Nobody to talk to, my father wasn't the best person to talk to about all my failures because my sister was doing way better than I was. The competition to be better than my sister was intense. But one day, I couldn't sleep. I tossed and turned in my bed, asking myself questions and answering them. That day, I remembered my grandma's words. I stopped trying to make my father see me and started living for myself.

This realization shaped my mindset. Instead of giving up when things don't go as planned, I now pause, reflect, and adapt. It taught me resilience, patience, and creativity, things no textbook could fully explain.For instance, trying to start a small business and failing opened my eyes to better planning and customer understanding. It hurt at first, but that experience built a stronger version of me.

This lesson is important because it changed how I approach every opportunity. I no longer fear failure; I respect it. And that shift has made all the difference.

Image is mine

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it is not a nice situation to find your parent measure your success and ability with a sibling, it is good that you understand now that failure is not the end and just part of our growth.

All thanks to my grandma

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