The one thing I had to unlearn in the first half of this year was always being in a haste, and looking back now, I did not even realize how much pressure I was putting on myself, see, I always felt like everything had to happen immediately, and If something wasnot going according to my plans, I would just start worrying and then overthinking every possible outcome.
So i honestly thought I had everything under control before I moved to Abuja in March, so here in my head, I had already planned how things would go, I thought once I got here that everything would just fall into place just exactly the way I have imagined it to be,but life has a funny way of reminding us that we do not control everything.
Nothing prepared me for the other challenges I had to face, some things happened that I never saw coming,there were moments I felt really really confused, moments I questioned myself, and moments I wondered whether I had made the right decisions, I won't even lie , it was not exactly easy settling into a different environment while trying to figure things out at the same time.
I was always worried, My mind was constantly filled with what ifs.
What if something happened?
What if things didn't work out?
What if I wasn't making enough progress?
It got to a point where I realized I was spending more time worrying about tomorrow than actually living today
That was not healthy for me at all and then One day I had to sit myself down and have a serious conversation with myself about , I told myself.... I was not in a rush or In competition with anyone
Those words may sound very simple. They meant a lot to me and yeah, I reminded myself that life is not a competition just because someone else is achieving things now does not mean i has failed because I am just not there yet.
The journey of everybody is different and timing is different too
From that moment, I started taking things one step at a time , Instead of trying to have everything figured out immediately, I focused on what I could do today, I stopped putting unnecessary pressure on myself.
I stopped expecting every answer to come all at once, most importantly, I started trusting that everything would eventually fall into place in its own time, that mindset alone gave me so much peace, of course, I still have moments when I worry. I don't think that completely disappears overnight, but now, whenever I catch myself rushing life or overthinking too much, I remind myself of the lesson I learned this year.
There is no prize for getting there first.
Sometimes life takes longer than we expect, and that is okay for me, As long as I keep moving forward, then no matter how small the steps are, I know that I am making progress Looking back now I can honestly say that stopping the habit of being in a hurry has improved my life and it made me calmer.
I have become calmer, I have become more patient with myself, I have learned to trust that the things meant for me will come at the right time one way or the other.
Not before.
Not after.
Just at the right time.
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