@LadiesofHive Community Contest #265 questions for the week are:
1οΈβ£ If you could get a second chance at something, what would it be?
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2οΈβ£ Do you feel older or younger for your age?
The first question of second chances makes me little emotional. In my growing up I never had my mother's presence. My parents were separated and I and my sister lived with my father, rather not with him also, we lived in a boarding school and only vacations we spent with our father. Being away from home environment all through my growing up, I really did not know how to live in a family environment. And then I got married very early by the age of 21 and started living suddenly in a joint family, where there was my husband and my in-laws. Relationship with hubby was of course very good but I was not able to set in well with my in-laws.
As time passed, I started having major differences with my mother-in-law, the main reason was we were not able to understand each other well. We both loved each other a lot and also cared for each other. It was a loving environment at home, but there were differences also, and majorly from my side. First of all, having an elderly person at home always guiding and telling me what to do, was somehow not going well with me, because I never lived that way. She was just being a Mother to me, like any other mother, but I was not able to be the daughter, like any other daughter.
I wished that I had this understanding a little early in life and learned to be cordial with her. In all of it, I did hurt her a lot in the process and that sometimes weighs very heavily on my heart. I always made it look as if it was her fault and never accepted my wrongs. It was after many years that I had these realizations, but then our relation till then had become bitter-sweet. If I would get a second chance, I would learn to live like a good daughter to her. Whatever she tried to teach me then, I thought was a burden on me, but today when she is not around all those teachings are helpful for me to run my own house. I was too arrogant then to learn from her :-( I miss her so much in my life now. I miss the motherly love that she gave me, which then I was not fully receptive to. I would like to live those moments again and be receptive to that environment rather then running away from it.
Feeling younger or older then my age?
I definitely feel very younger then my age. Not to brag about myself, but yes, I do not look my age, which is 50 plus and every one says that to me as well. Also most of my friends are younger to me, so being with them I too always feel like as of their age. The other main important part is my fitness level. I am physically very fit and active also, so if I have to compare myself with other people of my age I feel I am much more fit and that's what makes me feel younger then my age.
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