What kids truly need is to feel loved and seen, most especially by their parents.
My childhood was fun and memorable. I used to feel like a princess in the presence of my parents; I think I still feel like one, lol. I felt their love deep inside of me, and I carried that everywhere I go. I felt worthy and precious. Because of this, I know my worth and always know what I want.
I never felt the need to seek validation from people outside, none from my peers, and I never felt the need to fit in. In fact, I used to be the odd one a lot of times, and that was okay.
Some used to mistake this as if I had some pride, while some used to think I was very stubborn. But when I found myself in the midst of the right kind of friends, they knew I was cool on the inside and down to earth. I grew up in a neighborhood where kids could easily mix up with the wrong friends or even get caught up in their mess, so I needed that bold face in order to protect myself. While some referred to me as being stubborn just to get under my skin and make me feel insecure, I took it as a compliment and smiled because I knew who I am.
Peer pressure is real. The need to fit in and belong has led many astray and has led some to great life mistakes. But here is what parents can do to protect their kids.
In my case, my parents' love and discipline were my protection. I carried their love and wore it like armor. My peers' opinions had little to no power over how I think and how I act, especially when their thoughts did not align with my principles.
When you hear things like, "Everyone is doing it, why can't you?" but deep down you know it's the wrong thing to do, you can tell them, "Just because everyone is doing it doesn't make it the right thing to do." I used this line a lot while I was growing up.
Before anyone could influence me to do anything, I usually asked myself if such a thing had a positive or negative impact on my life. If the answer was the latter, I definitely was not going to yield to their wishes no matter how they tried, and that was why I was mostly referred to as the stubborn one — a name I was so proud to be identified with.
My parents always told me I should never feel pressured by the things I do not have yet because if I do the right things and work hard, I can achieve anything I want in the future.
They taught me to be content with what I have while I work towards the things I need. Because of this, no matter the situation I find myself in, other people's possessions never freak me out into doing the wrong things. Instead, I stay focused and work hard towards anything I need.
I learned that being the odd one is not always a bad thing as long as I'm doing what is right. I learned to think for myself instead of following the crowd, and this has saved me from countless troubles.
Most kids feel the need to seek validation from their peers and people outside mostly when the love they need the most (from their parents) is lacking. Discipline your child, let them know the consequences of their actions and, at the same time, give them the needed love and attention at home. I believe when parents do this, their need to seek validation elsewhere will be minimal, if not eradicated.
Let your home be their safe space, where they can be themselves and be free to talk to you about anything.
Create time for your child and play with them. It's not every time you dish out instructions; sometimes playing with your kids could help them and save you a lot of trouble.
Over to you guys, @cagolistic, @amma1, and @khadijaaya, how do you handle peer pressure? I invite you to join the conversation at hive student connect contest week 14
The two images are mine @funshee❣️✍️😊🙏
